Miss Molly thought of Polly,
good God have you gone crackers?
“Go grab a bloody sweater,
and cover up those clackers!”
Polly back to Molly,
“I’m not sure why it matters?”
“You’ll have the boys distracted,
and thinking with their knackers!”
Driving down the road 🛣️
Minding my own business
When buddy flips me the bird 🦜
I know free verse don’t rhyme
But this guy’s a real turd 💩
With my ego now bruised
My brain explodes 💥
And my senses go blind
What’s this clown’s 🤡
Problem anyway
Step on the gas ⛽
I weave through the rush
My window recessed 🪟
As I pull up to your ride
I start waving my fist 👊
Rhyme a curse at the lady inside
Don’t call the cops 🚓
That’s not meant for you
I got the wrong car 🚗
Mistaken identity I swear
I’m totally raging 🤬
As I punch it again
Blast past a school bus 🚌
This rhyming is insane
I catch a glimpse 👀
As you make the left
I race through the turn 🏎️
And ‘round the bend
Caught in my web 🕸
️The thrill of pursuit gone
What do I do now ❓
I take a deep breath and
In a moment of zen ☯️
My road rage does pass
I rhyme one last time ⌚
And realise, I’m the real ass!
What if I just said “Hi?”
Do you think she’d notice,
Maybe say Hi back,
Or will she ignore me,
Pretend she heard jack?
I could buy her a coffee,
See if she’ll stay,
Or take the drink gracefully,
And be on her way…
What if I smiled,
And shot her a glance,
Maybe some sweet talk,
Will get in her pants?!?
Wait, it wasn’t supposed,
To be like this,
She and her friend,
Just blew me a kiss!
I’m sitting her flustered,
Caught in a stare,
Should I just walk over,
and talk to the pair?
Instead I just pack up,
Head straight for the door,
Trip on my left feet and,
Fall flat on the floor…
“Are you ok?”
I heard someone say,
As I picked up my ego,
And just ran away!
Sitting in my car,
As if I could die,
What a novel idea
Maybe next time I’ll try…
What if I just said “Hi?”
She was here yesterday
Now she fades with haste
Like a distant memory
But I remember her face
She’s an unwritten book
Page after page
A canvas of white nothing
Like an empty stage
From music to silence
From movement to night
A forgotten performance
That never takes flight.
Her eyes, her face, her name
Reflect in the mirrors in a hall
Don’t make a sound
I hear voices in the wall
It’s hard to forget things
That were never said
Surrender to the shame
Playing games inside my head.
She filled my arms yesterday
Now she is all but gone
Alone in this empty room
I can still hear her song
Graceful in the night wind
Her voice in the cold night
Leaving me on my own
Her wings clipped, mid-flight
She was here yesterday
Now she fades with haste
Like a distant memory
But I remember her face
I can’t forget her face
I remember her face…
I have been sick for just over a week now and find myself tardy for Chel Owen’s Terrible Poetry Contest. I’ve read everyone else’s wonderfully terrible work and thought I’d submit a late submission. Hope you enjoy my terrible attempt at Burlesque poetry.
Growing old
If I may be so bold
Is a fate that really does blow
Things start to leak
Nothing’s at peak
And ear hair begins to grow
The girls may be hot
But it’s all for naught
There’s nary a twitch down below
My backs gone out
I’ve a bout o’ the gout
How I got here, I just don’t know
If I may be frank
Damn, my mind has gone blank
I barely remember my name
Gravity’s a drag
Pulling down on my bag
Wearing shorts only brings me shame
Life can be blunt
Getting old an affront
To how we once played the game
I’m a retiree
I’m well past my expiry
How did I get to be this damn lame
Carbon, methane, nitrous,
An atmospheric breech.
If global warming goes uncheck,
You’ll find me up in Greenland,
Sunbathing on the beach!
My head’s been set on fire,
My weary bones do ache,
I’m sizzlin’ hot to touch,
Still, I shiver and I shake.
With a scratch in my throat and,
A faucet for a nose,
That gets redder and more raw,
Every time it has to blows.
I’ve got blotches on my torso,
Itchy, scratchy and the such,
My palatine uvula is so swollen,
It’s becoming a little much.
I’ve burst blood vessels in my eye,
From coughing up a lung,
Don’t get me started on the back end,
Just get me a bloody bung.
My insides twisted up in knots,
Cramps eating at my gut,
Pressure building deep within,
Gases exploding from my butt.
I kneel before the Ivory throne,
Paying respect to the porcelain King,
I’ve eaten nothing in three days,
Still, I’m going to fill the thing.
I bolt awake at 2 a.m.,
Sweat streaming from my pores,
I’ve been lying here so bloody long,
I’m developing bedsores.
Not Tylenol or Advil or a combo of the two
Can soothe this pounding head,
Don’t know how much more I can take
I think I’d be better off dead!
I have not been feeling well, actually thought I may have contracted COVID despite three mRNA jabs but the Rapid Antigen Tests I’ve been doing daily keep showing up negative. Clearly, I have not been posting (or reading) over the last few days but I did dig up something that I wrote a few years ago when I purchased my first Surface Pro. It gave me an opportunity to play with the new stylus pen that came with the tablet.
I’m no artist but I just had to try and this poem is what I came up with. I saw a recent Sunra Rainz post where she had written a poem called The Sands of Time in the shape of an hourglass. It reminded me of this forgotten piece so I retrieved it from my OneDrive archive and dusted it off. The original idea for the poem was a funnel however it morphed into a tornado as I drew the grade one quality artwork. Both are fitting analogies, a funnel with the water representing life dripping out the bottom and a tornado representing the whirlwind that is life. The piece was unnamed at the time but as I put this post together, particularly the sentence before this one, I thought “Whirlwind” fit a pretty good description of life as we move through it much too quickly and so it is now titled.
Hope you enjoy it. I’ll be back soon.
When I awoke
Your ghost before me
Laid upon a secret altar
Please, I beg you to explore me
Thunder crashing
A sea of sorrow
Drowning in a raging ocean
No hope for a new tomorrow
Sense the feeling
Surrender to me
I don’t need your words to
Free me
Caught between
Two worlds colliding
To the earth
Your lifeline sliding
For the ones who watch in wait
This time it might just be too late
Standing at the edge of creation
Hoping, praying for salvation
Sense the feeling
Surrender to me
I don’t need your words to
Free me
Caught between
Two worlds colliding
From the beginning
Your lifeline sliding
Greg's Blog 